Quality of life

After reading your request for submissions on "Quality of Life" and those that had been sent in to date I felt compelled to write. I am a nobody in the world of triathlon -- my passion far exceeds my talent. To the best of my knowledge I own nothing with carbonfiber in it. I am not one of those people who dove into their first triathlon and won their age-group. I am more like one of those folks who lumber in near the end of the race after the massage table has closed, the water bottles have run out, and the announcer’s microphone is in the process of being packed up. I have however been touched by triathlon in a breadth of ways that have vastly improved the quality of my life.

I am a mom of three and a wife. I am an employee in the psychology department at our local hospital and am a retired age-group swimmer who lived in the pool until roughly the age of 15. I live a life of juggling, shuffling and balancing. After my third child was born I found it hard to stay awake at night to put them to bed, I found it difficult to chase my kids in the park without losing my breath, and I certainly could not run a mile. I got fed up. I was inspired by Oprah's completion of the marathon and so picked up her "Making Connections" book but found the only thing I could commit to in the plan was the daily intake of water – but I did begin walking on a treadmill 15 minutes per day. My neighbor then moved in who much like myself was "mostly mom". She had done a sprint triathlon two years previously and was eager to get back in shape. I joined in.

I am one of those folks who are old enough to say that I watched the original telecast of Julie Moss crossing the finish line. Today this pronouncement has become almost a cliché, but it left an indelible mark on my psyche. Not by design, but most years after this I found myself watching the Ironman each fall. I believe it is the intensity that pulls me. In 1984, I considered taking a year off to train for an Ironman but the forces of life dictated otherwise. Here I am, 16 years later aiming for Ironman completion in 2002 for my 40th birthday. I liken it to "Molly domestic meets the Irongods".

In my journey towards this Ironman, I have learned many things and come to accept many things. I am having to slay mental dragons some of which have been with me for 25 years. I have tested my desire with injuries that at any other time in my life would have made it acceptable for me to change course, devise a new goal. I remain steadfast and it feels very good. My children have seen me work hard and finish races. They often ask if I have ever won. I answer in the late great George Sheehan's words, that just by finishing I am a winner, that indeed I had to race longer and battle the demon `quit' monsters harder than those that were finished hours before I was.

My quality of life has improved because I am committed to a goal and waste less time and energy on filler. It has improved because I am fit and have reclaimed my identity as an athlete. Gone is my sense of myself as a quitter who cannot stick around when the work gets hard. I see everyday that I can work hard and I know for certain now that I finish what I start. As the physical fitness component of my children's education is whittled down to a fragment, my children see sports and active living as a natural component of our daily lives. They see us as a sports-oriented family in a world that is increasingly valuing a sedentary lifestyle.

So this commentary is from someone who has never "won", never come first in my age group or ever likely to go to Kona and still triathlon has touched me. Everyday I am thankful for the gifts it has given me on a physical, emotional and spiritual level. I recently hired a coach to help me stay focused on my goals because I know that I now need help to get to where I want to go. I cannot do this alone.- another lesson learned, another way my quality of life has improved. As I settle into a more purposeful training program I realize I have far to go. I am an eager student and will probably drive Kevin crazy with my questions and thinking. That said , I also know I have come a long way, that this passion that I have for triathlon has helped me to feel more complete, no matter what the finish time says.

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