Kirk Noyes is heavily involved with his family, the Texas triathlon scene and various other hobbies and interests when he is not on the road traveling for his job. Meet this passionate former marine.

Slowtwitch: Thank you for your time Kirk.

Kirk Noyes: You’re welcome Herbert. I appreciate the opportunity

ST: I bumped into you at Challenge Dubai and that is a long way from Texas. But word has it that you are a busy traveling man.

Kirk: Yeah you could say I do a bit of traveling. [laughs] I have been to 34 countries as of now and every continent except Antarctica. I recently found out a girl I work with has been to Antarctica and she got her passport stamped and everything. I was pretty jealous.

ST: What can you tell us about your job?

Kirk: I help run a small engineering firm out of The Woodlands TX. We design extended reach and horizontal wells for clients who don’t have that expertise. We are very niche organization. We focus on reducing the footprint or impact a drilling operation has on the environment. If Chevron said we have a target here but can’t get to it because of something. We design everything from the rig they need, to the hole sizes, and how they would drill it.

ST: How did you like that race?

Kirk: Aside from not having a great or good race even, I thought it was a great race. It was well supported and felt like a local type event but on a much bigger scale.

ST: Was that your first Challenge event?

Kirk: It was, I had initially planned on doing the inaugural Bahrain race but was forced to change plans at the last minute. I used to live in the Middle East in the early to mid 2000s and really wanted to support the region through this sport. I really like what the Crown Prince has done and hope to see it continue to grow in that area. I think people get the wrong perception about the Middle East, the Arab peninsula in particular. It’s not the Gaza strip or Afghanistan. It is a very peaceful place and I have a lot of fond memories of living there.

ST: Why do you think people have such a perception?

Kirk: Well, first off let me just say I know I am going piss someone off with this answer because everyone feels they are right. I grew up in a very conservative southern Baptist household and I still have that same faith today. When I went there I went not knowing what to expect and prayed that I would have an open mind. What I found was nothing like what is reported here in the US media or European media for that matter. As a young kid all I knew of that area of the world was what little I had learned in school, which was basically nothing. I think the perception of that area is driven from Media outlets and people who have never been there. What people see is not what is actually there.
We all have different belief systems and I can assure you we all feel ours is the right way but at the core of those relationships is respect. I respect them as humans and they respect me because I listen. I could really talk about this for days. I just wish the Western media would be more accurate in what is happening over there but that doesn’t drive ratings. That isn’t to say that the region is without fault either. Their reporting of our country can be pretty comical sometimes and they certainly like to stoke the fires. I just hope more Westerners will continue to travel to the region to support the races.

ST: You also did an Ironman in Switzerland. How had you decided on that one?

Kirk: I did and that is a pretty funny story - to me anyway. A lifelong buddy of mine TJ Fry who I help run a triathlon team in The Woodlands with South Coast Endurance and I had always talked about doing a European race or something and it always came down to finances, as it would with anyone. I had committed to doing Texas again as I had a bad race in 2013 and had already registered. I was surfing Facebook and noticed that TJ Fry was signed up for Ironman Zurich. I was like - What the hell? I called him and said “Hey bro, did you sign up for Zurich? I thought we always said we would try and do one over there together?” he said “yeah…there may have been some margaritas involved with that.” Within 3 minutes I was signed up for Zurich and on the phone with my wife who at the time was in L.A. with our daughter for a dance convention and just said “hey babe, change of plans for my Ironman next year, we are going to Switzerland to race.” She just shook her head and said “umm ok, sounds great.” Next thing you know we have 20+ people going and we made a huge group trip out of it. What an experience. So far my favorite experience for an Ironman. They absolutely know how to put a race on. First class.

ST: Many folks are in general hesitant to travel abroad including Western Europe and I think they miss out on experience like that.

Kirk: Yeah, I will partially agree with that statement. My younger brothers and I have all traveled extensively and we talk about this subject a lot. I agree that people miss out on many experiences by not traveling. There are two reasons in my estimation why people don’t travel to Western Europe from the US. One is the cost. Contrary to what people think and believe, most Americans can’t afford to just jump on planes and jet over to Europe for a holiday. I think if you asked most Americans they would say they would love to travel there but can’t afford it. Second, and this one ties into the first, is that if you look at the United States and what all we have to do and offer it’s tough to justify going overseas when we have beautiful beaches, mountains, monuments, etc. Hell, I have spent only 2 days in New York City in my life so there is quite a bit I still want to see here.

ST: Talking about here, in 2013 at Ironman Texas you ended up not finishing. Can you talk about that day?

Kirk: Yikes. Yeah, my only DNF. That was a bad day for sure. Well, from what I can remember of that day was we started out in a mass start and around what I have estimated as the 500 meter mark I felt a blow to my left temple and all I saw was stars. I remember stopping and looking around and thinking “What the hell just happened?” and that was about it. I have a few vague memories from the bike but only like 3-4 moments, I remember my cousin passing me saying he lost his disc and I remember thinking “how the hell do you lose a damn wheel in a race?!” I got back to T2 and sat down in a chair they said and they asked if I was ok. I then stood up and started stumbling around and bounced off the tent wall. Needless to say my day was over, I started throwing up and they pulled my chip and took me to the Hospital. Thankfully Ironman Texas’ title sponsor is Memorial Hermann Hospital and they have the best physicians in the world right there on site. I ended up taking 8 bags on the IV and staying most of the night. I had a pretty bad concussion with no short term memory. It took a long time to recover from that day. People ask me all the time why I kept going and I say “well if I actually remember that day or what was going on I probably wouldn’t have.”

ST: At Ironman Texas this year you were full in, but not in the way people might imagine.

Kirk: Hell yeah, we were full in! Not as a competitor but as what I like to say a “competitive fan.” It is seriously exhausting doing what we do out there at Hippie Hollow.

ST: How did that idea of Hippie Hollow come up?

Kirk: About 2 months out from 2014 Ironman Texas, one of mine and TJ’s lifelong friends and one of the coaches who works with us said we should do a cheering station at Ironman Texas. We immediately jumped on board. Jesse Robinson is who the idea was born with. Both the hippie idea and the cheering station. I was reluctant to do the hippie idea at first as I had thought it had been played out and everyone else was full bore so I jumped in and that is where my alter ego was born. Stormy Carl. TJ is Trash Can Jesus and Jesse is Griffin Liberty. The Week of Ironman Texas we become those men. Those Hippies. So much so my wife actually asked if I was ever going to do Ironman Texas again. I’m not sure. [laughs]

ST: Is there a rivalry of sorts for the best race support spot with folks like Moxie Multisport?

Kirk: Hmmm…I can give the politically correct answer or the Stormy Carl answer. He would say “Nah man, we don’t compete at anything cause that is what the man wants. We don’t let the man tell us anything.” All I know is we are out there before the pros show up and until the last person is off the course bringing the same intensity the whole time man. Both stations feature half naked fit people running around and both stations bring a lot of intensity to the course and it is all in good fun but I don’t remember seeing any pros referencing any other spots in their post race media comments other than hippie hollow.

ST: I think Kellen Hood and his crew will call you out to be wrong.

Kirk: Yeah it’s all in good fun. [laughs] I mean, if there was a rivalry then that would be great because you know what? The participants benefit more. That’s what it’s all about. I was in the United States Marines so I certainly love a challenge. I love the Waterway at Ironman Texas. You float around that path. Switzerland felt a lot like that. Spectators everywhere.

ST: What was the most impressive race performance in Texas you witnessed this year or are aware of?

Kirk: I had a unique opportunity this year to help with the Ironman live updating as a spotter for the pro female swim and the pro male bike. I would say the two things that stand out in my mind are watching two guys who I know personally because I swim with them when they come into town and train. We all swim with the same swim coach Tim Floyd at Magnolia Masters. Watching Joe Skipper beat the bike course record here was awesome. Every time we drove up to him he had this look on his face like “holy shit is this happening? Am I dropping everyone??” It was awesome to watch him ride away from Lionel Sanders, only because of the magnitude of the moment, not because I wish ill will on Lionel who I have met and have nothing but respect for, and the rest of the field. The next was watching Matt Hanson glide across the run. Man that cat can fly. He makes it look effortless. Matt is also one of the nicest guys you will ever meet. He is a sponsor’s dream.

ST: How many hours a week to you dedicate to triathlon training?

Kirk: Not as many right now as I am recovering from shoulder surgery. On average I would say I spend between 12-16 hours a week training though. Thankfully I have a wife who loves that I still want to compete and loves coming to races. I try to keep my training as non-invasive as possible. Lots of early, early morning runs and lunch swims with evening trainer or quick spins.

ST: What about basketball?

Kirk: Finally, a subject I love talking about. Basketball is my first love really. If you follow me on twitter you will see my “statement about myself” says I am a 6’10” power forward stuck in a 5’10” triathletes body.

ST: Ohio State Buckeyes or Houston Rockets?

Kirk: You sound like my kids. They ask crazy questions like this to me all the time. “Dad, if Michigan was playing Russia, who would you root for?” Hahaha. I always say my comrades. I would say my Ohio State Buckeyes. I bleed Scarlet and Grey. I grew up in Columbus, Ohio.

ST: I think you found triathlon in 2010. What inspired you to do that and what about it kept you attached?

Kirk: I was doing some adventure racing and the coach I was working with said I should do some triathlons to supplement my training for adventure racing and to see how I would do and well… I don’t think I’ve done but one adventure race since then. I was hooked immediately.

ST: What will be your next race and what is the goal?

Kirk: Not sure right now but eyeing Buffalo Springs or Muncie. I am registered for Arizona right now and that is my only Iron distance race this year. I would really like to qualify for Kona and [70.3] Worlds. That is my big goal for the year but ultimately I go into every race with the goal of executing the way I want to. If someone is fitter than me so be it but if I execute well and I get the most out of my body that day then I can rest my head.

ST: I think you have a dog named Mooch. Can you describe to us what he would do with a burglar?

Kirk: He is a 160lbs Bullmastiff and I’m not sure what he would do. He might lick them to death or drool on them. Ironically we got him after we were broken into in December of 2009, while we were home. My wife never wanted a big dog until that next day. 8 weeks later we had Mooch and my kids have a new pillow they lay on in the living room.

ST: Is there anything else we should know?

Kirk: Not a whole lot. I was in the United States Marine Corps. I also am a scratch golfer. If they ever come up with an event for doing an Ironman then play 18 holes…I feel pretty confident I could be up at the top. Let’s figure out how to get that started. Thanks Herbert.


You can follow Kirk on Twitter via @kirk_noyes